Undo Button

By September 5, 2010October 5th, 2019Courage, No Regrets

I recently located the “undo” button for my online checkers game, allowing me to instantly erase a move that cost me a king or a double jump. How nice would it be to have an “undo” button for life? How many times have we all said something we wish we could delete or acted in a way we’ve conveniently glossed over in our memories? The undo button also allows us to make the mistakes but not incur the consequences (losing).

No Mistakes, Little Progress

As a teacher, I would write “MAKE MISTAKES” on the board the first day of class in all caps. Few if any of my students had ever heard this from anyone, much less an adult. I explained that when learning a language it’s important to make mistakes because it allows for faster progression. If one only says the same phrases and sentences over and over, language becomes stilted and boring and there’s little room for expansion. “How are you?”  “I’m fine, thank you.”  Safe, yet uninteresting.

Pictured with some of my students from Ningyuan, Hunan

Pictured with some of my students

I followed my advice in China, knowing that any ‘mistakes’ I made were a natural part of being an outsider in a foreign land. In my home country and culture, however, I find myself more conscious of my faux pas and less accepting when I do or say something I later wish I could rewrite.

Safe but at what cost?

“Just Around the River Bend,” the theme song from Pochahontas, reminds us “to be safe, we lose our chance at ever knowing what’s around the river bend.” Living a safe and predictable existence leaves little room for expanding life’s vocabulary. Where’s the excitement, the adventure, the curiosity?  I might win more checkers games, but is it fulfilling?

I got where I am today because I took risks and made ‘mistakes.’ I learned faster and it made the wins more valuable. There will always be the moments I wish I could repeat or go about in a different way, but as my favorite line in Pocahontas says, “what I love most about rivers is you can’t step in the same river twice.” For better or for worse, we can’t go back.

No Regrets

We can give ourselves and others a break, realizing we’re human and we’re continually learning. Besides, when I do leave this world, I would rather go out knowing that I lived fully, with few or no regrets, and most importantly, with lots of laughter.

Join the discussion 8 Comments

  • Lori says:

    Wow Jackie….I love that you know not to take life too seriously! When you grow and change it can be a little uncomfortable but always worth the journey.
    I love you and miss you!!!

    Lori

  • Luca says:

    Jackie, always great posts from you. So sad to hear that this experiment is almost to an end. If only I could be a little more couragous in my sentimental life, and dare to check what’s behind the river bend! But I am positive something good is there, I may just not be paddling as fast as Pocahontas does!!
    Hugs from Nanjing,
    Lu

    • Jacqueline says:

      Luca, you’re in Nanjing! That’s further than Pocahontas ever went, and I’m absolutely positive something great is just beyond the riverbend! xoxo

  • foodhoe says:

    what an interesting premise, how ironic that I found this site on the last day of the 6 months… I hope it continues on!

  • melindam says:

    I haven’t thought of that song in years, but I love it, too. Thanks for reminding me! I’m 30 and have finally found a job that could be a career, and one that I enjoy, but I feel like I’m avoiding decisions that could take me really cool places, like Korea to teach with my cousin, simply because I’m afraid. LOL, didn’t always used to be that way!

    There are lots of things I wish I had an “undo” button for, but I’m also learning to (at least try to) accept my mistakes and move past them. Good luck with the rest of your life, and I’m sure this experiment will help you view it in a wonderfully different way!

    • Jacqueline says:

      That’s great that you found a job that you really enjoy! I think it’s easy to look at the “exciting” opportunities in life and feel like we’re not “living,” but I’m realizing (after living in abroad for 3 1/2 years) that life in the States is exciting too, just in a different way. There’s so many ways to live! I wish you the best and hope that no matter what you end up deciding, you’re happy!

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